Weight loss journey update- I am obliged to end the journey…for sometime


From January 24 through May 6, 2011, I went from 227 to 198 lbs, dropping one size, keeping up with my diet and exercises. My goal was to weigh 141 lbs as of February 24, 2012.  Unfortunately, I will not make it…

When I last checked my weight, last wednesday, I was 208 lbs.  I gained 10 pounds from the 30 pounds I lost because I am an emotional eater.  When I am sad or confused or mad, I eat to find comfort and relief. Instead of eating when I am hungry, I eat in response to my feelings. I eat without even realizing I am actually eating.  And then, I feel guilty after doing it. I feel so good when I eat in response to anger, sadness and confusion.

While I am aware of the problem, I am not ready yet to overcome it and that’s why I am stopping my weight loss journey.  I am going through some difficult situations and put aside prayers, I find a super comfort in eating.  It calms the pain, it soothes my wounds and it keeps me mentally alive.

Tears are coming out of my eyes, flooding my cheeks as I am writing these lines. I worked so hard to lose some extra pounds, I was really into it and because I have to feed my feelings, I am losing the results of those long days of hard work.

I can’t help it, I am stopping my weight loss journey. Life is hard, food is easy…

 

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