When My Feelings Turned Into Extra Calories…


We are in the fifth month of this year and I have already gained and lost and gained and lost again around 05-20 pounds. I started the year with Size 12-14, I got to 16-18, went 14-16, went up to 18 then got back to 16.  I am not a typical yo-yo dieter. I am an emotional eater and it is sabotaging my weight loss plan.

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Eating has  always been my primary coping emotional mechanism but years ago, I would express  my pain, frustration, disappointment, fear through tears.  However, nowadays, my feelings turned into calories.     Whenever I am upset, angry, stressed, hurt or afraid, I eat.  That chocolate melting on my tongue and the liquid making his way through my stomach; that cheesy and meaty food making me feel oh so better- so soothing…so relieving….FOR THE TIME BEING!  Afterward, I am left with double guilt and shame: the guilt of having unhealthily addressed my problems and the guilt of having consumed unnecessary calories that will eventually screw up my weight; the shame of having failed to control my body.

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What’s bad about my emotional hunger also is that it makes me crave fatty foods and sugary snacks that provide an immediate rush- chocolate, pizza, steak and cheese sandwich, velvet cake, etc…

Sometimes, I manage not to eat to compensate my emotional needs and it works just fine-getting better at it actually.  However, on days like today, all I can afford is being an emotional eater: turning my feelings into calories.

Confessions of an emotional eater.

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